Saturday, September 23, 2006 -{'10:53:00 PM
Title : [ what am i feeling now? ]
Hi everyone. hm..on friday there was post exam activity. There were JCs, Polys and ITE exhibits. I think it was an eye-opener for me. I get to know more about the kind of life which i am going to lead in less than a year later. How soon. Yet, with this kind of feeling, i feel very insecure. Probably i dont want to move away from my comfort zone. It takes time to grow roots in a unfamiliar place after primary school. It will also take time to move on to a total new environment. I welcome and also resist such changes. Hopefully there will be at least some trace of soil that each and everyone of us will not forget and trace back on...Hm..oh yes, the talk on the personality test was great. Am a S. People oriented and introvert. That is really true for me. I live for the sake of the livings around me. I dont usually blurt out what hurts, anger or even things that make me feel sad. All these reflections only come through within myself. Am not wearing a mask... Just that i feel better in this way. maybe. If only someone understands. S people are suitable to take upon job such as teacher, councillor, musicians and Funeral manager. Hm..how interesting. I may consider upon them. This test really make me understand a lot on myself. Sometimes, i dont even understand myself at all. Hard to believe yea? By understanding other, isnt it also another way to understand and reflect upon one's self? I feel so...
I did really laugh out hard during the two talks that were conducted. I have never laugh that hard after such a long time. I feel relieve. Glad that i am still alive uh? Sometime, i always think of a lot of stuff which seem to unnecessary. However, why is everything that i ever thought of seem to be coming true? I never knew things will turn out the way it is now. Who cares to know that i'm not happy for what have happened? Everyone just seem to be going on his/her own way. Ever spare a thought for others? Maybe is my personality that make me feel this way..so much of being a S. I feel that i am leading a contridicting life. My feelings are fluctuating these days. Dont worry, am still who i am.
How can i cry and by the next moment, i laugh? Be right back.
Friday, September 15, 2006 -{'10:11:00 PM
Title : [ ]
' hmm..is this going to burst under my weight?' murmured winnie the pooh.
--if there is a will, there will be a way--
-{'9:49:00 PM
Title : [ Recharge ]
Hi everyone. Hm...now it seems to me that i am having a little break for myself. And for that, i shall do some contributions to this lifeless blog. hm...today we had A math paper2 and Physics practical. werid combination. It requires your mind to switch to the correct mode fast! Challenging uh? A math paper gave me a series of cold sweat. It is so amazing how they can set a paper which can stunt one and as well as twisting and turning the route to get the correct answer. *applause* As for me, there was only one possible solution at the point in time. guess? yea...wacked my way through. Whether if i ever wacked the right point, it dont seemed matter that much now...since was over and done with. Move on yea?Hm...i was freezing cold when i left the school hall. My teeth cant help but to keep chattering. I wonder if i were in Genting. HA HA. yea. then, i followed the rest to canteen and "thraw" myself. I didnt get anything to eat as i didnt have money with me. I dont want to owe people money too..so..a few more hours of hunger then i will be free. Back to exam, physics practical was a really challenging one. I dont have good encounters with the pendulum experiement. It keep giving me problems..and for that..i had to call for help. Huiping noticed that..think i've made her nervous too. hm...to sum up in all, physics practical was an eye-opener for me. Just see how i fare this time. >.<
Hm...i wonder if i ever have work hard for my prelims. But somehow, i only knew that i dont allow myself to leave the examination room with regrets..i make sure i used up all the energy stored up..and disspiate them until the last few bars. For what? These last few bars are for me to walk home, climb the stairs, have the energy to hunt for food in my house, and best of all..is to walk myself to the bed and proof...i'm knocked out.
Best of luck to everyone. I will be back
Wednesday, September 13, 2006 -{'9:31:00 PM
Title : [ mental war. ]
Hi everyone. Jia you ba!
Saturday, September 09, 2006 -{'9:14:00 PM
Title : [ Beyond the surface. ]
Hi everyone. well..today i didnt feel quite well. DOnt know why, nevertheless,i need to get well before next week starts.Hm..today went to ate breakfast with my mother. Just a few table away from me, i saw a father brought his 3 childern to eat breakfast at the same place. well..you might think nothing interesting or what. yea. true enough. However, the actions that the father did was really caring and affectionate. I really admire that a lot. Little actions shows a great deal of love. I dont know. I might the one of the people roaming around from places to place. sometime aimlessly. But, i like to check out things which seems so ' invisible' to many of us. A man is able to take the role as a mother or even replace a mother whenever the mother was away. I wonder how his kids feel. Fortunate? probably they are too young to understand. hm..why am i so emotional about it? i dont know. Looking at how happy they are seems to overtake my whole scope of view. Well, after all...am just an outsider. Am glad to notice that this world still has existing love. Hm...isn't it a classic example that we usually dont realise how fortunate we are until we realised it from others. There are times when we feel it's too late to repair anything. However, right now when everything appears the way it is, is there any other way to change the situation?
Hm...school starting soon. The holiday seems to be a whirlwind to me. well..one thing that i am quite happy is that i am able to spend more time with my mother. I get to hear things from the point of view of a mother. Like i say, time is simply there for us to grab on. Only that there is a will that there will be a way. clear cut. heehee.
I like this song a lot. It truely speaks my feeling. Sometime, words dont speak everything. I can also be out of words too...
When I am down and, oh my soul, so weary;
When troubles come and my heart burdened be;
Then, I am still and wait here in the silence,
Until you come and sit awhile with me.
You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up: To more than I can be.
You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up: To more than I can be.
There is no life - no life without its hunger;
Each restless heart beats so imperfectly;
But when you come and I am filled with wonder,
Sometimes, I think I glimpse eternity.
You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up: To more than I can be.
You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up: To more than I can be.
-JOSH GROBAN Lyrics
Wednesday, September 06, 2006 -{'7:47:00 PM
Title : [ stand still ]
Hi everyone. Hm...today went back for biology practical. hm..well..we did an experiement on grasshopper. hm..the thought of killing these insects is not within my imagination. You may think that i am soft hearted. no..but rather, i respect all living organisms and their lives. Hm..thoes few that are left being in the box for display..should i say that they are so much fortunate than their fellow mates.Hm..i got a grasshopper which was struggling while i was drawing the protrait of it. hm...after which, it is vibrating it's hind legs at high frequency. hm..probably the insecticide was not that efftective after all. Hm..at the end of the experiment , i saw many of them disecting it..and i choose to keep it aside since it is vibrating to vigorously. I have no heart to kill it. Then, i release it back into the grass patch which was outside of the biology lab.
stand still. No matter how things might...i need to let go of what is troubling me. believe.
